why appreciation matters

Photo: Cate Blanchett, Taylor Russell (2022 Venice Film Festival)

People are like plants that need to be watered. Plants need water to grow, to cool, to photosynthesize, just as humans need water to stay alive. When you don’t care for a plant, it visibly shows, almost like it wants everyone to know it was neglected so it would be cared for again. You take care of it so it’s nourished and so it lives. A healthy plant is a cared for plant, a healthy plant is an appreciated plant.

There was a book I read years ago which said something that has remained glued to my memory. I don’t have the quote in verbatim, but I remember it stated that when we see that someone is good at something, we ought to encourage them with it so they don’t lose it. The last part drew my attention because we don’t often talk about how things seemingly fade away when we pay less attention to them. It’s why people sometimes give up things like certain talents or skills they feel aren’t valued. If you don’t value something today, it will go where it is valued tomorrow - just like the infamous saying goes: “you don’t know what you have until it’s gone”.

We water people by appreciating aspects of them that they perhaps didn’t even know needed watering, by encouraging them to keep up with whatever goodness we’ve spotted in them, by affirming them, by making them feel noticed. This doesn’t mean placing one’s entire value on external gratification; perhaps the most important form of appreciation is the one that comes from within - the self acceptance, love, and assurance that defines self-appreciation. External gratification will not mean much if it’s lacking within.

Lastly, appreciation is a form of gratitude. It’s like a “thank you / thank this part of you for existing”, which is sort of a perfect compliment.

With that, thank you for reading, appreciate you always.

Until the next one

-C